Discovery in Korea
A True Story of Adoption, Identity, and God's Perfect Timing
In early 1979, my wife Sue and I adopted our daughter Dena, a five-month-old orphan from Korea. At the time, we knew only the basics: she had been born to an unwed mother and cared for by a foster mother until she could travel to the United States.
We had begun the process years earlier with the Dillon Adoption Agency, but Dena’s adoption came with delays and red tape. Still, she was well worth the wait. Dena has always been a joyful, compassionate, faith-filled person—and a blessing to our family.
A Life of Compassion
Dena’s empathy was evident from a young age. As a teen, she spent time comforting the elderly, often visiting the residents of Waveny Nursing Home in New Canaan, Connecticut. One blind woman became so close to her that she was heartbroken when Dena left for college at Calvin College in Michigan.
In her junior year, Dena arranged to study abroad in China. Before she left, I asked if I could meet her in Korea on her return trip in December of 1999. She was excited by the idea, and we began planning.
Although Dena had never shown much interest in her birth parents, I gently asked her if she wanted me to try to find out more.
“No, Dad,” she replied. “You and Mom are my parents.”
Sue and I were deeply touched. But I still wished we could help fill in the blanks about her origins.
A Journey Guided by Faith
In Seoul, we spent three incredible days together—despite the language barrier and frigid weather. While I stood out as a tall American, Dena blended in easily and felt surprisingly at home.
I suggested we visit an orphanage so she could see what life might have been like if she hadn’t been adopted. She agreed.
The orphanage was clean and well-run, though it lacked what every child truly needs: loving parents. As Dena played with preschoolers, I could sense her thoughts drifting toward “what-if” territory.
The director mentioned that he had worked at a nearby adoption agency back when we adopted Dena and encouraged us to visit. We followed his advice.
A Remarkable Discovery
At the agency, we were surrounded by foster mothers holding babies. It was moving to think that Dena had once been one of those infants, cared for so selflessly. Our guide asked:
“Do you remember Dena’s Korean name?”
“Jung Ja Moon,” I said, giving her birth date.
To our surprise, Dena was still in their database. The only reference was the name of her original adoption agency: Dillon Adoption Agency.
“Why don’t you visit them?” the guide suggested. “It’s only a few miles away.”
This time, Dena was eager. We both felt something larger than ourselves was leading the way.
The File That Changed Everything
At Dillon, a young woman greeted us warmly and soon returned with a three-inch-thick file.
Inside were documents we’d never seen before, including the original application Sue and I had filled out 20 years earlier.
“Shall we look?” the guide asked.
“Yes, please,” we replied.
She translated interview transcripts from Dena’s birth mother, who was 26, unmarried, and no longer seeing the baby’s father. In her culture, having a child out of wedlock—and placing that child for adoption—carried significant shame. To protect her family, she had left home to give birth in secret.
We were overwhelmed with emotion, especially when we saw photos of Dena with her foster mother.
This information could never have been found through phone calls or letters. It was a journey only made possible by being physically present—and, I believe, by the hand of God.
Though we didn’t try to contact Dena’s birth mother—out of respect for her privacy—we left Korea with gratitude and a sense of closure.
The Reunion We Never Expected
More than a decade later, in 2010, Dena and her husband, Doug, returned to Korea—this time to meet her birth mother.
Though initially reluctant, her mother agreed under one condition: the meeting would remain secret, as her family didn’t know about Dena.
The reunion happened not once, but three times during that trip. They agreed to maintain contact through the agency.
Doug and Dena described it as “the experience of a lifetime.”
God’s Perfect Timing
Looking back, I am convinced this was no coincidence. From the first step in Korea to that final meeting over a decade later, each moment felt guided by divine purpose.
God made a way for Dena to discover her roots, meet the woman who gave her life, and experience peace in a story once full of unanswered questions.